Last week Utz was purchased by Snyder’s of Hanover. When first hearing that Utz had been purchased I panicked like I had just seen Dave Trembley give the sign for Russ Ortiz to come out of the bullpen. I assumed Utz was going to be bought by the big bad Frito Lay chip company and that those corporate fat cats at Frito Lay would just start putting their flimsy, greasy product in an Utz bag. How horrifying! Any true Baltimorean should know how much better an Utz potato chip is than a Lays potato chip. It is not just original either. Across the snack food board, right down the finger-licking white cheddar popcorn, Utz makes a better product. No Baltimore football tailgate is complete without a “Family Size” bag of Utz. If you bring Lays to the tailgate you may as well come in the opposing team’s jersey because you are clearly not from Baltimore and may be even more ignorant than the hillbillies who come down from Pittsburgh.
After a few Natty Bohs and the realization that Utz had been purchased by Snyder’s of Hanover I was able to relax. Like Utz, Snyder’s is located in Hanover, PA and has been providing quality snacks to Marylanders for years. Snyder’s has minimal competition with Utz because they focus on pretzels. They are the geniuses behind the honey mustard pretzel bites. It was a great move for both companies. They need to merge their resources during the economic downturn to continue to put edible snack foods on our shelves.
I am not sure what we would do if we lost Utz. I can’t put that processed Frito Lay junk in my mouth and still enjoy myself. The Baltimore picnic as we know it might cease to exist. The blandness of those over-salted trash chips would cause color to drain from the city and we have to learn to live in the bleak conditions in which the rest of the world suffers. Post-lunch productivity in Baltimore would decrease because of the onset of depression when our crabcake sandwiches were served with Lays. Baltimoreans don’t let this happen! Continue to fight the good fight! Whenever you have the craving for a crisp potato chip, for all of our sakes, reach for the Utz.
(A few quick recommendations: It doesn’t get any better than Utz’s Kettle Classic Smokin’ Sweet potato chip. I promise you will become addicted after one bite. I also recommend picking us a bag of the new Salsalita line. Both guacamole and salsa are very good. Finally, keep an eye out for the Utz Multi-grain Sunflower chip line. I haven’t had a chance to try it, but I haven’t been let down by Utz yet.)